Dear Television Dave June 1, 2010 Blogs Dear Television, My name is Declan and I am currently at home all day. As most of my friends are lucky enough to have jobs I am forced to turn to you for entertainment during the day. I am a man of simple tastes, I do not ask for much from you as you have been a good companion. I was wondering if you could find it in your infinite wisdom and good heart to please show more promotional material for the show Glee, I feel that one promotional spot per ad break for a programme of such a high calibre as Glee is hardly enough to do it justice. Every time the highly effeminate male character makes a quip regarding Lady GaGa I positively fall off my chair with the amount that I am guffawing. I would like to see more of these 30 second rib ticklers per half hour. Television, Im not a media whore but in the spirit of openness which I have approached you I must confess that I also have a healthy interest in music. I can now take great pleasure in informing you that I adore the fact you have decided to play the cast of Glee singing the always pleasant Dont stop believing under every promo piece for Glee despite changing the images around. Although I am currently salivating like a hungry dog at the prospect of watching Glee I have yet to have the pleasure of seeing an episode. I understand the premise of the programme to be that they are a Glee club and as such sing many songs, am I mistaken? You have so whetted my appetite for Glee that I need answers now! Do they sing other songs or is it just Dont stop believing? Television, I must also commend your wisdom in having Glee on not one but two channels. This means that I, as a potential viewer get to see double the amount of promotional material. In fact not only double the amount! Glee happens to be on stations that have sister stations so thats four separate stations running promotional material for one programme on a consistent basis. Not one, not two, not three but four, four stations where I can learn that Dolphins are just gay Sharks (which, as a side note I know to be a distortion of the facts as you have provided me with the Discovery Channel and during Shark Week they make no reference to Dolphins at all). Oh and television, the first 200 times I saw the effeminate male doing the dance from Beyonces Single Ladies video I must admit I did not see what all the fuss was about HOWEVER, you can only imagine my delight when at the 354th viewing a wry smile spread across my face because, why would a man dance to a song that is intended for ladies? Its so mad cap! Outstanding work Television! 10/10! You would think that having clips from the show running non-stop on a twenty four hour basis on four channels would be MORE than enough to pound my brain into submission and, as mentioned earlier it has, I now love Glee so once again you can only imagine my delight when this week at nine oclock in the evening the Oprah Winfrey show was on. But Declan, Oprah is usually on at two in the day, why was it on at nine in the evening? I hear you ask, well television, Ill tell you! The reason Oprah was on at nine in the evening was because it was a special edition of Oprah. Oprah was interviewing none other than the cast of Glee! Delightful! I am surprised that it was not broadcast on EVERY station simultaneously! I am surprised there were not public screens set up in the Malls and the Plazas and the Stadiums of the world so that all and sundry could experience Oprah: The Glee Special. If governments can organise such outdoor displays for things as trivial as World Cup Football and the results of elections then surely they could have intervened for this! It is a shame and a shocking indictment of this country and indeed this government that the public cannot bask in the fabulousness that is the girl with the giant nose, the effeminate male, some sort of punk woman, a guy in a wheelchair, a fat chick and a jock coming together through the unifying force of Journey (and I think Madonna and other fabulous songs). Television, can I be honest with you? I have not felt this way about a television programme since the first two series of Lost. As I said earlier, I want to watch Glee but I feel that I have built it up too much in my own mind now and Im too shy to approach it. What if we dont click? What if Glee doesnt accept me? What if Im left out of this massive pop culture phenomenon? Im going to take the plunge. Thank you television for forcing Glee on me, I will go out and buy the albums and the half season on DVD and any other merchandise available. Sincerely Yours, Declan Tweet
